Yesterday I was deciding what CDs to “legally” download and after I “legally” selected some Parliament and Johnny “Guitar” Watson, I figured I may as well grab the new Rick Ross. Shit, I liked his debut (Port of Miami), so there was a slim chance this would be at least near its level.

Emphasis on slim. Just like the first CD, this shit has some bangin beats on it and some great guest singing, but that’s about it. Rick Ross’ shittastic rapping was tolerable on his first CD, but I suspect that it’s just because I hadn’t heard him much when I first picked it up. At least he has a cool voice – and that’s about all it takes nowadays.

I really like the street single, “Speedin’,” with Mr. I Wanna Piss On You R. Kelly, but it’s not like there’s anything good on it except the beat and singing.

The whole CD’s basically the same story, except there’s a lot of shitty singing thrown in here, too, like T-Pain, whose fucking awful “Boss” may be the straw to finally bust the talentless camel’s back wide open.

Ross is different as far as rapping – on his first CD, he was just boring, here he’s aggressively bad. And stupid, like how he claims to still be pushing weight and hanging on corners. No one bought that shit on his first CD, and that’s not changing. Sorry, Rick.

Listening to this, I get the idea that Ricky isn’t exactly going to age well. Maybe someone should just shoot him already so the South can pretend he’s some underrated rap legend worth 50 cents at a swap meet.

Just like they’re doing with Pimp C.

Check it: Speedin’ feat. R. Kelly (this may be the funniest rap video ever made; I just about shat myself when, instead of paying a 10 dolla speeding ticket, Rick bolts out of his car, waddles away from the po-po, and jumps off a fucking bridge. Classic.)


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